Miss u dad!

So hi uolls! Assalamualaikum 

  

Today I just want to talk about my 'arwah ayah'.  Last monday, dah genap 6 years ayah tinggalkan adik.To be honest yes I really really miss him so much but yet I cannot meet him face to face anymore. It just to fast for me. I can't imagine how I should survive my life without a person called father. Eventhough I have my mum but I still need mah father ok. Ok don't misunderstood, I really love my mum. She's everything to me. They way she teach me, treat me, taking care of me. Its was so perfect! I couldnt deny it! She such a tough woman + caring. Walaupun suka membebel  anyway there are some reason that sometimes I suddenly think of him and yes it successfully make me cry hm... Every time my friend just randomly discuss about this topic I automatically turns into a very sensitive person BUT I still can hide that feeling. Yes my ego stop me from show it in front my friend hahahaha.. Ok whatever

Then bila happy father day, everyone will posting their picture with their father and bla bla bla.. Ok I just hm! Sedih siot adoi! But actually I don't care much about this matter because I think I'm matured enough to think it twice before do any actions. Anyway the feelings naturally came and I'm used to it now but still I miss mah father so much! So here I have some um what u call it eh? I don't know la just read it ok!

For u ayah, 

    

                        Ayah, I know it had been so long since you leave me, it had been 6 years it was when I'm 11 years old. I know walaupun adik and ayah tak dapat spend time together selalu dulu, but I still remember your jokes, your kuih yang pelik but sedap gila tu, your perangai yang mostly turun dekat adik, and all your memories with me. Most of people yang adik kenal mesti cakap mah face looks like you and perangai pun lebih kurang, hadoi lagi la sebak en..  Even though kadang kadang ayah garang dengan adik but its ok tak best la kalau ayah asyik baik je 24hours kan? Hahaha... I still remember when I'm standard 4, adik jaga ayah masa cuti sekolah 2 bulan tu. Eventhough lebih kepada cuti for have fun je dekat perak because that time pun Yong bersalin kan? So main dengan baby lagi. Sorry la because that time I still budak kot . Tahu nak main je. And that time you dah susut badan semua. Kurus gila kot Sedih tu memang sedih but you still can laugh and made jokes! Ayah selalu suruh adik solat. Adik ingat lagi dulu I love to play with your stomach because I always said you looks like a pregnant mom! Hahaha... And I really love to play with your janggut! Addicted sumpah! Haih.. And yang paling adik tak akan lupa is because of you, my left hand ada parut! But its ok its actually help me to bezakan which one  is right or left hahahaha... Walaupun everywhere adik pergi mesti orang akan tanya the same question sampai adik rasa give up nak jawab. Rasa macam nak tulis je atas board besar then pakai so biar semua orang nampak and no need to ask me "what's happened to your hand qila?".  I remember that day it was monday, 9 February 2009 at 5 am something, mama wake me up and I just though it time for school but that day it was different! Mama kejutkan adik sambil menangis. I didn't expect anything but I know it was bad news. I ask mama "kenapa mama menangis?" When the moment she told me that you had just left us and that means you were passed away. I just cannot said anything. Im just hurry take a bath and kitaorang terus balik Perak. Because that time ayah stay Perak. Surprisingly adik tak menangis walaupun setitik air mata adik. Sampai la ayah dikebumikan pun adik still tak menangis. I just cannot.  And now I always cry because of you.  I just cannot describe how much or how big I miss you. Because whatever ways I show or my effort that I miss you, I will never get chance to meet you. Please remember eventhough one day I will get married and found my prince charming, you're still my number one hero in my heart. There's a lot more to say but its okay it just between me and you. Insyallah one day we will meet again in jannah. Semoga ayah ditempatkan di tempat orang orang yang beriman. Semoga ayah tenang je dekat sana. And I will try my best to kurangkan your bebanan and keep pray for you. And lastly, I just want to say, Ayah, adik rindu sangat-sangat dengan ayah! Please always remember that I will always love you. Your name will always in my doa!

                                      Your cute daughter,

                                                        Qila

Ok! I think thats all for this entry. Thank you for spend your time to read my blog ! Much love - Qeelz  ✌